Movie Review: Premutos: Lord of the Living Dead (1997)

Comedy, Horror, Horror Comedy, Movie Reviews

Premutos

”Premutos: Lord of the Living Dead”, also titled ”The Fallen Angel” was the first fallen angel, according to legend in Olaf Ittenbach’s cult classic. Long before Lucifer had his little hissy fit, Premutos was rebelling against Gods decree because he wanted to rule the world with his army of the dead.  Throughout the ages, the son of Premutos has been reincarnated in different forms and through the dreams of a young man, we see the demon throughout different times in history slaughtering humanity.  When the young man finds a mysterious book, it turns him into the monster he was always destined to be and the son of Premutos is reborn once again.

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”Premutos: Lord of the Living Dead” is a film with lots to admire, appreciate and enjoy.  For a start, it’s excessively violent and gory, with a body count that’s well past 100 – all of whom die in fun, graphic ways.  The special effects are cheap and charming and the aforementioned gore is top notch.  Furthermore, the plot, in all of its simplicity, is interesting – especially when it bounces between different eras of history, which includes World War II and the middle ages.  There is a lot going on which will keep you entertained for the most part, but the filler in between is tedious.

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Splatter movies are at their best when they’re wacky, but so much of the humor in ”Premutos” is falls flat.  The moments madcap madness and bloody carnage are a joy, but waiting for them to come is tedious at times. Granted, when they do arrive it’s worth the wait; but movies like this need interesting filler if they’re going to run for 106 minutes, and ”Premutos” lacks in that department.  To put it bluntly: it gets boring.

With some trimming around the edges, ”Premutos: Lord of the Living Dead” could have been a trashy masterpiece of its kind.  Instead what we get is a film with a see-saw effect of highs and lows.  Pirates had to do some digging before they found the treasure; if you’re willing to stick around with this movie you’ll find gold in the end.  6.5/10

Director: Olaf Ittenbach

Writer: Olaf Ittenbach

Starring:  André Stryi, Christopher Stacey, Ella Wellmann

Genre: Horror, Comedy

Running Time: 106 min

Short Film Review: Wasted (2015)

Comedy, Horror, Short Film Review

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Cinecoup is a Canadian project where independent filmmakers submit 60 second trailers for a chance to win 1 million dollars to make a full feature, and have it released at Cinecoup theatres across the country.  And the cool thing about it is that, we, the fans, get to take part and dictate the voting  It’s thanks to Cinecoup we have Wolfcop in our lives; but what will be the next cult classic in the making?

One of the entries in this years contest is Wasted, a slacker comedy with zombies.  It revolves around a group of deadbeat friends as they drink terrible Canadian beer, smoke the drugs and discuss how they’d survive a zombie apocalypse.  The star of the show is Mark, a stoned budding sociopath, who is not only convinced the zombie apocalypse is going to happen, but he’s actually looking forward to it.  His friends – Sid, Steve and Anthony – are a little more grounded (and sober) than Mark, but not nearly as equipped.

In order to survive the end of mankind as they know it, a Zombie Survival Kit is a necessity; this kit has to include essential items such as a first aid kit, with bandages, rubbing alcohol and so on.  Flash lights are also a requirement; as well as matches for light, cooking and smoking Mary Jane.  But, the most important item of all is condoms, just in case you bump into a hot survivor – or decide to have sex with the undead.  Personally, I’d take either at this point.

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Mark also plans to drive around with an AK47, a chainsaw and a samurai sword in the trunk of his car, which makes sense since he’s the weapons and hunting expert of the group.  Anthony, on the other hand will be their designated doctor because he ”looks like one”. due to him being Asian.  Moreover, Steve will need to learn to become a mechanic, and from what we see of him fixing cars in their hypothetical discussion, he’ll need to become a better one, should an outbreak happen.  Lastly, they’d need a builder, which would be Sid’s duty, and like his friends, he’s a fumbling mess of a man.

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Their discussion is accompanied by animated diagrams of their plan, and live action scenes of their potential scenarios.  There’s ample amounts of blood, explosions and walking undead to wet your appetite, but it’s the relationship between the characters that makes it engaging.  They’re a loveable bunch of goons who seem to have it barely figured out.

I was treated to an exclusive of the 12 minute short film, which will hopefully light up many a festival in 2015, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.  The strength is in the characters: you could watch an entire movie of these guys just hanging out, getting drunk and talking nonsense and it’d be fantastic.  I don’t know what they put in the beer over in Canada, but whatever the magic ingredient is, it’s inspired some good humoured genre pictures the past few years, and I have no doubt in my mind the guys at Retro Grave Productions will make many valuable contributions in the future.  Just like the act of getting intoxicated, Wasted is mindless fun, filled with laughs, joy and imminent violence.  8/10

For more information, you can follow Wasted on Twitter and Facebook.  And if you like what you see from the trailer, pop on over to Cinecoup.

Written & Directed By:

Satheesan Nagenthiram

Starring:

Darrin Drugan, Steve Kasan, Samuel Lin, Satheesan Nagenthiram

Genre:

Comedy, Horror

Running Time:

12 min

Short Film Review: Tales of a 5th Grade Zombie Slayer: Day 1

Horror, Short Film Review

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Tales of a 5th Grade Zombie Slayer has enjoyed some moderate success on the festival circuit; having initially finished in the top 3 of the 2013 Scream Factory Competition, it’s went on to receive considerable acclaim, and the upcoming follow-up, Day 57, has already played before a sold out crowd back in October at the Horrible Imaginings Horror Film Festival in California.  At this time of writing, it is currently an entry in the Rue Morgue sponsored Horror Block Monstrous Movie Contest awaiting the results, but regardless of whether it wins or not, Carl Smith and Jeffrey McLaurin can be proud of their work.  This is going to bring a lot of smiles to the faces of horror fans.

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 Tales of a 5th Grade Zombie Slayer: Day 1 is the first of a prospective web series chronicling the adventures of groups of kids as they try to survive a zombie apocalypse.  Each episode will be based on a different day of the outbreak, and will follow a different group of kids every time.  During Day 1, we follow a group of kids as the outbreak is happening and watch them transform from Little Rascals to bat-wielding, brain bashing bad asses.  It’s The Sandlot meets Dawn of the Dead – and yes, it is as good as it sounds.

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Personally, I love movies where children are heroes; and I love movies where children get massacred.  Tales of a 5th Grade Zombie Slayer has children smashing zombie children with bats in a playground, so what’s not to love?  We don’t get a lot of horror adventures in this day and age where the kids are heroes, never mind the monsters, so it’s a pleasant change of scenery to see a universe without adults where the brats can run amok.

The performances from the young actors are fantastic and adorable.  Not only is it obvious that everyone involved is having fun, but the kids are very talented and I predict we’ll be seeing some of them crop up in movies and TV in the future.  There’s one iffy moment where a kid doesn’t react to finding his mother dead; but maybe he hated her so it’s not important.

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With more episodes on the horizon and a comic book companion, Tales of a 5th Grade Zombie Slayer has a bright future and long may it continue.  Zombies have been done to death in horror, but every so often they come along and bite you in the good way again – like a love bite.  I am happy to report that Tales of a 5th Grade Zombie Slayer is a hicky to be worn proudly without a scarf.  This has the potential to be an excellent ongoing adventure, full of exuberant charm and children being harmed. You can watch Day 1 below, so check it out, give it a like and a share, and support independent film.  8/10

Also be sure to follow on that Twitter and like on the Facebook

Written & Directed By:

Jeffrey McLaurin & Carl Smith

Starring:

Gabe Krut, Jourdan Jackson, Wyatt Chapman, Marco Baroudi, Tyler Desharnais

Genre:

Horror

Running Time:

10 min

Movie Review: Hans Crippleton: Talk To The Hans (2014)

Comedy, Horror Comedy, Movie Reviews

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A few weeks ago I was treated to my very first screener courtesy of Jimmy Lee Combs, a very talented independent filmmaker from Colorado, whose full-length directorial debut feature, Hans Crippleton: Talk To The Hans, is sure to send shock waves through the horror community when it’s released later this year.  Granted, Hans is not going to please everybody: In fact, it’s more than likely going to offend a few people with its transgressive humour and politically incorrect social brand of social commentary manifested through oddball characters.  However, Hans doesn’t care about the boundaries of good taste: as a matter of fact it joyously stampedes through them like a crowd of hillbillies who procreate within their own gene pool should.  To say this is a film with balls is an understatement; but as ridiculous as it may be – and ridiculous it is – Hans is also a film with brains, which the zombies really want to eat.

Hans Crippleton: Talk To The Hans is a difficult film to describe: I believe the psychological term for it is ”batshit crazy.”  However, let me give you the simplest summary: It’s a mockumentary about a family of inbred backwoods hillbillies who are plagued by an ancient zombie curse.  Their story peaks the interest of Barnaby Hunt (Andy Hankins), presenter of the supernatural show ”Horror Hunts”, a show which seeks out real life cases of the paranormal.  The movie documents the cripple Hans (Kevon Ward) and his outrageous family as they discover the origins of the curse; all the while our protagonist undergoes a ”from rags to riches” rise to stardom, and self-destructive fall from grace.

There’s a scene within the opening 3 minutes of Hans where we witness a mother running around her garden, being chased by zombies, dragging her baby by the umbilical chord, that just so happens to still be attached to her womb.  If that sounds like something that appeals to you, then you’re in for a treat for the following 97 minutes.  This sets the tone for the rest of the film: a gleefully inappropriate romp that pays no attention to morals or good taste, and it does so in a fun, harmless way.

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What I really loved about Hans was its irreverent satire, which poked fun at celebrity culture, reality television and conservative ethos.  Furthermore, they even took shots at their haters on social media.  It’s refreshing to see such a punk rock attitude from filmmakers: in an industry where most make movies to try and reach the largest audience possible, the team behind Hans are only interested in pleasing themselves and their fans.  Kevon Ward (writer and star) is reminiscent of Lloyd Kauffman, Trey Parker and John Waters in a sense; they too defy conformity with discernible wit and hilarity.  It’s going to offend people, but it’s going to offend with style.

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As I said earlier, Jimmy Lee Combs is a filmmaker with a lot of talent and potential.  Having already established himself as a director to watch out for with a number of diverse, critically acclaimed shorts, he took the reigns for Hans more than ready, and it shows.  For a micro-budget feature, Hans has more than adequate production values, it’s incredibly well shot and it bursts at the seams with passion.  The make-up is beautifully hideous, the effects are practical and there’s plenty of blood to please your sickening lust for the gruesome.

Watching Hans, I recalled my first time watching Braindead (1992) and Bad Taste (1987).  Here’s a group of friends with a lot of talent, making a ridiculously fun film, that’s sure to resonate with future generations of fans of offbeat, dirty cinema for generations to come.  8/10

Stay tuned with my interview with director Jimmy Lee Combs!!!

Directed By:

Jimmy Lee Combs

Written By:

Kevon Ward

Starring:

Kevon Ward, Andy Hankins, Irene Leonard, Katie Bevard